1) Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress,
I keep losing my temper with people.
Doctor: Tell me about your problem.Patient: I JUST DID, DIDN'T I, YOU STUPID BASTARD!!!
2) In a psychiatrist's waiting room two patients are having a conversation.
One says to the other, "Why are you here?"
The second answers, "I'm Napoleon, so the doctor told me to come here."
The first is curious and asks, "How do you know that you're Napoleon?"
The second responds, "God told me I was."
At this point, a patient on the other side of the room shouts, "NO I DIDN'T!"
3) A guy goes in to see a psychologist.
He says, "It seems I can't make any friends.
Can you help me, you fat slob?"
4) what is Difference between a man buying a lottery & a man arguing with his wife/girlfriend ?
Ans. A man buying a lottery has a chance to win !!5) Lalwa, "My wife fell down in our water well, must be badly hurt
and she was screaming a lot."Friend, "Oh what a mishap, but how is she now?"
Lalwa, " I guess she must be fine, I don't hear any scream from well any more."
6) Lalwa saw a wooden notice board in the middle of the big pond and had forgotten
his eye glasses at home. He could not read, so he swam all the way to the board and read,
"Lake infiltrated with killing Crocodiles, do not swim."
7) Actor Balvinder kapoor to his Friend : Hey watch my movie on TV
Friend : Ohh but there is no Power !Balvinder : Hey Dude put candle and watch ...whats wrong.
8) when you feel sad, go infront of mirror.
look at yourself and say "I am so cute. u will smile automatically.but dont make it habbit because ...
roz - 2 mazak acha nahi
9) Differen b/w rain in india n dubai:
In dubai,after rain,the water disappears in 5 mins..In india, after rain,the road disappears in 5 mins!
10) I was rejected at a job interview bcoz
when i was asked to give an example of gud team work
i replied MASS BUNK..!!
when i was asked to give an example of gud team work
i replied MASS BUNK..!!
