English Jokes : Home Page Page No : 8
1) niku was traveling in a bus.
suddenly the bus lost control & fell in a river.
but niku kept searching for SOME ONE SPACIAL.....
A man asked him to whom u r searching ?
niku repllied : Conductor kahan hai 5 rs. lene hai....
wife : ten yrs (10)ago, he was my boy friend and i denied him
from marriage.
husband : oh my God, he is celebrating till now.
She keeps doing this until her neighbour asks her why she is doing that.
The blonde replies "My computer keeps telling me that i've got mail".
patient 1: hey man, how will they paint such a big Aeroplane ?
patient 2: it becomes small when it flies in sky, they will paint at that time.
patient 1: you are a real genious.
patient 2: you know but the people here doesnt know it.
Patient: I JUST DID, DIDN'T I, YOU STUPID BASTARD!!!
The first is curious and asks, "How do you know that you're Napoleon?"
The second responds, "God told me I was."
At this point, a patient on the other side of the room shouts, "NO I DIDN'T!"
1) niku was traveling in a bus.
suddenly the bus lost control & fell in a river.
but niku kept searching for SOME ONE SPACIAL.....
A man asked him to whom u r searching ?
niku repllied : Conductor kahan hai 5 rs. lene hai....
2) wife : look at that drunk man.
husband : who is he?wife : ten yrs (10)ago, he was my boy friend and i denied him
from marriage.
husband : oh my God, he is celebrating till now.
3) Three Ways of fast Communication
1: Television
2: Telephone
3: Tell-a-women
4) Always think positive. How?
When a bird shits on you, just look into the sky while saying:
'Thank God elephants don't fly.'
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5) You've got mail, the Blonde version
A blonde keeps walking down her drive to her mail box. She keeps doing this until her neighbour asks her why she is doing that.
The blonde replies "My computer keeps telling me that i've got mail".
6) In mental hospital:
patient 1: hey man, how will they paint such a big Aeroplane ?
patient 2: it becomes small when it flies in sky, they will paint at that time.
patient 1: you are a real genious.
patient 2: you know but the people here doesnt know it.
7) Arz kiya haii- Ap ke chehre par udaasi aur aankho mein nami haii ....
- - - - - - - - - - TATA NAMAK Iztemaal karo, Ap me iodine ki kami haii .... !8) Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress,
I keep losing my temper with people.
Doctor: Tell me about your problem.Patient: I JUST DID, DIDN'T I, YOU STUPID BASTARD!!!
9) In a psychiatrist's waiting room two patients are having a conversation.
One says to the other, "Why are you here?"
The second answers, "I'm Napoleon, so the doctor told me to come here."The first is curious and asks, "How do you know that you're Napoleon?"
The second responds, "God told me I was."
At this point, a patient on the other side of the room shouts, "NO I DIDN'T!"
10) A guy goes in to see a psychologist. He says,
"It seems I can't make any friends.
Can you help me, you fat slob?"
